I believe truth always wins.
Several years ago, before Kota knew all of my story, he randomly asked if I had ever been married before.

Cue lump in throat.

I told him, no. I told a lie. I lied.

I lied to my son.

Perhaps that wasn’t the time to tell him. I don’t know. But my past, and all its uglies in that current withholding state I’d been living in for years, was tearing my insides up. I was in a perpetual state of egg-shell walking whenever my kids were with me in groups of friends who, almost always, would ask how my book was coming along. I’d have to quickly divert the question or give them half answers because I hadn’t been upfront with my children yet.

That was an exhausting time for me.

Since sharing the ugly truth about my past the air is clearer, lighter. The conversations are sweeter and deeper. The gazes from my son are covered with admiration. The bond with my daughter is stronger.

In my booktruth always wins out.

I’ve learned a couple things about truth…

*Timing is crucial. Obviously I couldn’t tell my kids about my entire past when they were super young. It would’ve been too much for them to have to process. Was my telling Kota ‘no’ technically lying? Was it withholding? Was it protecting? I suppose it was a little bit of all three. Timing is a hard one to navigate. I encourage anyone to give it a lot of thought, prayers, and seek wise counsel.

*The delivery can be a deal breaker. Sometimes truth hurts not because of what is said, but how it is said. However, even with the best of deliveries, the truth may still hurt… but if it’s truth, then it is always beneficial.

There is freedom in truth. This, I know.

What have you learned about truth?

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"Choosing To Change"

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