Victim Or Survivor?

Recently, after sharing my story with a small group of ladies one of them asked me, “Do you ever want to erase all the bad memories from your mind?”

Without hesitation I answered… No.

I’ve never once wanted to forget all the things I have gone through. Even the super-duper tough and ugly stuff, the moments that are still hard to talk about because they inflicted so much pain and, to be honest, there is still pain-residue.

No, I don’t enjoy going over my past in my head. But I also don’t purposely sit and do so. My history has, and is, serving a purpose and I am grateful for that.

But the reason why I answered no is quite simple, and if you are a victim of past abuse or are living in regret over some poor personal choices, I hope this will encourage you…

No, I have never wanted to erase all the bad memories because they keep me tender. They keep me tender toward others who are navigating their own healing journeys. They remind me where I have come from and where so many are right now. And more often than not a person who is hurting just needs to know they’re not alone in their pain.

But my favorite reason for being able to answer with a no is this…

@@A painful memory recalled is proof that I survived it.@@

Oh how that realization changed so much for me! My ability to sit and recall a memory means I am alive today. I survived. And it is that truth that has breathed life into what I do today.

Are you sitting with painful memories? Then you are a survivor. Those memories will always be there but the kind of power they have over you is your choice. 

@@Are you a victim of your memories or a survivor of them?@@