I would like to speak to two groups of people. The abused/once abused and the never abused. To the never abused. To the one who has never been beaten to the point of bleeding. To the one who has always known the love of a loving father. To the one who was always encouraged as a child and supported at every turn. To the one who has never been molested. To the one who never doubted the love of their family. Please know this…
For the one who has experienced all, or some, of those abuses and, yet, has the ability to love – You need to know that to learn to love has taken a lot of work. A lot of hard work. To love is to trust. To trust is to be vulnerable. To be vulnerable, for them, is like telling the world it’s ok to hurt them again. No, there is no rationale behind that thought process, but it is their reality. Trust me. So to love without borders for a once abused person does not come easy. It’s scary and it is hard.
To the once abused… @@Your past abuses, injustices done to you, do not exempt you from social graces.@@ You may not have learned to love and trust again, but the world is not your enemy. I’ve been there. I know that period of time where it clicks for you but you still use your past to get something, or to avoid everything. You’re better than that.
Love is not a commodity. Love is a gift. If it has been abused then know – and I’m speaking to both sides – that it is a powerful thing to have the ability to accept it again, and even more powerful to give it.